Understanding old people when they are sick

It is probably hard enough for our children to understand us under any circumstances but when you are sick it seems to be even more difficult.   Your family has so many things going on in their life and you the sick one has only yourself to focus on in the illness.  Fortunately I can manage my own pills, doctor visits, etc. but little things can drive you crazy for example:
1. Taking pills.   I have to take so many pills just getting them ready every morning wears me out.   You have to take most of them with food so it means finding something you can eat in the Am, noon and at night to take with each set of pills. I have to have my coumadin level checked periodically and this is another challenge to keep track of.   I think it is the routine of carefulness that is so tiring.   It is important to carry your list of medications with you and review them with any health care professional so that you don't mix the wrong drugs.

2. Looking good and feeling terrible.   I try to take care of my hair and clothes and when you look yourself everyone thinks you feel good too.   Not so.   No one wants to go around looking like poor me.  Please don't get me wrong.  I am very grateful for everything my son and daughter-in-law does for me and I love living with them and the grandkids but there are differences and trying to understand them is important at least for the older person who has to really deal with them.  Right now my heart problems are complicated with a fractured disc in my back.   This is really frustrating because you can't bend over, pick up the kids or do regular straightening of your room.   Of course no one but you understands why doing any of that would make you feel better.   Just another thing you have to live with.
3. Finally going to the emergency room is no fun.   I am blessed to have good care givers at Austin Diagnostic Clinic.   My general physician has email and is always responsive to requests and information sent to her.   The cardiologists all take good care of you and Dr. Mejia my cardiologist is appreciated.   But it is very lonely waiting for tests and then next steps.   I am blessed with years of training in meditation and Healing touch and that helps the loneliness.

I hope these rambling thoughts help my kids understand a little about what it is to be old.  I'm sorry they have to go through this with me but I am really glad they are there for me and I thank them for all they do.

jl Alpine Advent Calendar

Every year Coop and I share an advent calendar.  It is a wonderful way to have special moments with your grand children.  This year we are exploring together the Alpine Village Advent Calendar.   We have the opportunity to visit each day in December before Christmas and do puzzles, make stockings, build trans and decorate a big tree all on the internet.   These are colorful and creative opportunities to talk about the meaning of Christmas, Santa, and looking forward to special family events.  It's also a wonderful time to hold your grandchild and hear his ideas about Christmas, the baby Jesus and why his family is important.   Thanks for the creative people who make these opportunities for us.  You can check them out at www.jacquielawson.com   Enjoy.  14 days till Christmas

Thel Elf on the Shelf is Back

Everyday the Elf is somewhere watching if little boys are good for Christmas.  Ashely and Matt are very creative where the Elf is placed and Cooper comes down in the morning and looks for him.   Today the Elf wrapped the Christmas Tree in toilet paper and was sitting in the roll watching out for little boys.  Tomorrow I think he is going to be making pictures on a whiteboard around a family picture.   Cooper is a lucky little boy to have so much fun with his parents.
This was also Dec. 1 so we could do the first day in the Advent Calendar.   It is amazing to see the excitement and innocence in these little guys. 

Thanksgiving 2012

It is wonderful to have a happy family.  I am so fortunate to be able to see the everyday little things like Cole sitting up and hearing Cooper's great conversations with his parents.  Living all together is not always easy but the rewards are so great it makes it all worth while.   Thank you Ashley and Matt.

It's hard for little boys to be patient

Jacquie Lawson animated card web site has a great advent calendar.  They started last year with London and things you could click on for each day in December leading to Christmas.   This year it is the Alpine Village.   Cooper and I love to open each activity but it doesn't start until Dec. 1 and we have a week to go.   Everyday he asks why we can't start.   Fortunately they have a tree you can decorate and a puzzle you can do while you wait.    We also are watching the live feed of the rein deers on the internet and once again we have to wait to see Santa feed them until 5 PM.  More waiting and waiting.   We seem to always be waiting for something.  Patience isn't easy for little boys or families or grandmothers but we know that if we can be patient something good will eventually come if it's worth waiting for.   These are lessons that come up living together and give us a chance to talk about important things.  Cooper is trying hard to be patient. 

Loving him is like driving a new Maserati down a dead end street

Taylor Swift was singing this line in her song while I was exercising.  I had to stop and  think about it and what it meant.   I couldn't help but wonder what ever happened to "love is a many splendid thing".    The line in the song has been going though my brain for the past few days.   It makes me realize the gap between myself and the grandchildren.   How will they see love someday?

Story Circle

This past weekend I had a wonderful gift from my good friend Joyce Boatright.   She came in from the Woodlands and took me to a Story Circle workshop on exploring happiness.  15 Women attended the workshop led by a very creative facilitator Jeanne Guy (www.jeanneguy.com).   We spent the day pondering through thought, word, and writing what is happiness.  What really makes me happy are my grandchildren and family.  However it's pretty clear that happiness is something we create for ourselves.  Staying in touch with good friends, being willing to explore new experiences, being honest with yourself and writing are ways I find that happiness.  Story Circle Network is a not-for-profit organization dedicated to helping women share the stories of their lives. Check them out at www.storycircle.org

Well Actually...

Cooper comes up with the funny sayings.  Today I asked him where one of his cars were and he said, Well Actually, it is in the other room.   Of course he had no idea where it was but by saying well actually he was giving himself time to think up an answer.
Well actually, I am enjoying Cooper and Cole and watching them bond more and more each day is really fun.  Cooper likes to pull Cole around in his jump seat.  Cole loves it.   He laughs and laughs now whenever Cooper comes up to him.  I can't wait to see what they both will come up with when Cole is 3 years old and Cooper is 6.   Of course by then they will probably be texting us.

Saturday morning visitors

What fun.  The Crowley boys come to visit.  Of course we have to watch cartoons.  I am becoming great friends with Little Bear who they love to watch.   This morning Cooper told me he wanted to be a doctor and that Cole would be batman.   We suspect that Cooper would like to be a doctor because he would have access to the snack room at the doctor's office.  He never misses a chance for a snack.   It is a wonderful feeling to hold your grandchildren and have little chats.   Of course this only lasts so long and I hear them calling mommie or daddy and they are off to another adventure.

Photo Book

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Bonding on the beach

We just got back from a great week in Galveston.   The kids went from the beach, to the pool, to the lazy river.   Then back at the house we played games and did arts and craft activities.  It was great for all the cousins to make sand castles and share toys.  It was a peaceful week with some great sunsets, lots of laughter amid a few squabbles and tears.  I am so glad to be able to be a part of all this.

Living the Dream

It's an amazing feeling sitting by the side of the road and waiting for the neighborhood 4th of July Parade.   Here comes the high school marching band.   Then the fire truck and constable's van come blaring down the road.   Every group in the neighborhood comes marching behind them and then comes your grandchildren riding their decorated bikes or being pushed by Mom and Dad.  You applaud and yell words of encouragement.  Then all the marchers and watchers have watermelon and stand around visiting.

Who would have thought that I would some day be having a normal family day with my son and family.  As I look around at the Bighams, Ripeys and Crowleys, our family, having lunch together after the parade I smile and say Thank You.

The Things Cooper Says

Last night Cooper came up to me and asked me to open my mouth.  When I did he said "very interesting, you have a gold tooth".    Where he comes up with these questions is beyond me.  Matt used to come up with some good ones too when he was little.   One day he came into the bedroom and said Mom I need help.   I think I have a "radio-active" hand.    It was the first time his arm had fallen asleep.  I used to be very good at copying these sayings and am going to try to be better about capturing the things Coop says.

Little Cole Arrives

Monday, April 16th, little Cole arrived safe and sound.   We(Nana, Pap, Courtney, Hank and I) all watched (even Cooper) as Matt and the nurses bathed Cole for his intro into the Bigham/Crowley Clan.  We were so excited and happy.   His mother and dad were happy too and I felt warm wonderful feelings when Ashley and the baby were brought to her room and Matt and Cooper joined them for their first family group hug.   We all waited so the four of them could have time alone.  Little Cole is already fun to hold and watch.   I can hardly wait to see what his personality will be.   He is looking all around and making sounds.   Every day sees changes and one is reminded of how beautiful children are especially when they are your grandchildren.

What are friends for

A good friend of mine, Joyce, came to visit yesterday and reminded me that I had not written in my blog since January.   Joyce is an author and writer and we have been good friends since 1983.   I took writing from her once a week when I was in Houston and recently reread some of that work and must say I impressed myself.   Joyce uses prompts to help you think and gather your thoughts around the prompt.  One of the prompts we discussed during her visit was a time that changed your life and then what values were a part of that time.   We discussed creativity and courage and for the life of me I can't remember the third one.  However that is what friends are for.   They remind you of times shared and to stay true to yourself.  I think I decided that the changes in my life took "courage".

We are awaiting the arrival of little Cole in about 2 weeks. Cooper went to big brother class last week and Ashley and Matt are doing a great job of making him feel a part of the whole process.  Cooper has such a great little personality and we can hardley wait to meet Cole and see what he is like.  I hope that Cooper and Cole will be great friends.

Wow! Where has the time gone?

I can't believe how long it has been since my last entry into this blog.   The time was spent recuperating from the heart surgery and then in August a Pacemaker.   After that I have been going to cardiac therapy and I must say that exercise is an amazing thing and has helped me recover and be more like my old self.  Of course Cooper is a big part of recuperating.   For instance today he and his dad kept playing pirate and Coop would run into my lap and ask me to save him from the pirate.  Of course I would say get out of here pirate.   Leave us alone.   The wonderful part is holding him.   I remember right before Mom died that she said she wished I was little so she could hold me again.   I think I now know what she meant and what a wonderful feeling it is to hold the little guy. Happy New Year!!!