Getting Old is Not for Sissys

Many thoughts going through my mind after coming home from surgery.   They took good care of me in the hospital.  Was there for 7 days.  I really like my doctors and enjoyed the many personalities of the nursing staff.   I often found myself practicing my consulting and communication skills. I even offered to do Laughter Yoga one night at midnight.   The real eye opener though was the warm feelings from family and friends.   I know the surgery room was full of angels and I could feel them.   Am slowly progressing and can really appreciate what folks who have heart surgery go through.

I also appreciate what it means to have a caring wonderful family.  I hope my grandchildren appreciate their parents and can someday return the care and love they gave them.   It is a great feeling to feel your son's strong arms help you out of bed or a chair.

Heart Surgery is finally here!

After 3 months of waiting tomorrow is the day.
They say it will be easy because I'm fit and ready.
Am I scared? just a little, but with so many prayers and
a wonderful family I know I am safe.
I know the operating room will be full of Angels making
sure the docs and nurses are on and that my heart is steady
and ready to be repaired.
Can't wait to feel better and can really play with Cooper Lee
and will be great to go here and there with the family.
Hurrah, Hurrah, Hurrah!!

Cousins are the Best!

Last night one of Cooper's cousins Hill spent the night with us.   Hill is about 10 years older than Cooper and is a wonderful role model for Cooper.   He will forge the way to Camp Longhorn  every summer,  show what it's like to play basketball and football, and give Cooper someone older than him to look up to.  He also has Mary Ella who shows him love and tenderness see their picture below.   Hank will be a great friend almost his age.   We can only imagine the trouble they will get into since they will probably be in the same grade.

My Dad had eleven brothers and sisters so you can imagine the number of cousins I grew up with.  I think this is where I learned all about community.  Every year we would all gather in New Jersey and have so much fun growing up together.  It is wonderful that Cooper will have a similar experience and so many pals to share life and laughter with.

Even if I can't see you, you can still see me

It's funny how little children hide and think that you can't see them because they can't see you.  Yet their feet hang out from the pillows covering them up or you see the top of their hair over their blanket.  Sometimes I wonder if we don't play the same game with ourselves.   Thinking we can cover up and not be seen.   One gift we can give others is to let them know we see them and it's ok.

Watching How to Train a Dragon

Last night Cooper and I watched How to Train a Dragon.   It is your basic story about a little boy whose father has dreams for him to kill dragons and be a fierce viking but the little boy has other ideas about dragons.  Of course he eventually wins the day and his father excepts him for who he is.   I think the big lesson of the movie is how important it is for grandparents to accept their children and grandchildren for who they are not what you think they ought to be.   I think this is especially important when you are all living together.  You have a lot to learn from each other and I feel like I am learning a lot.  Am thankful for this opportunity.

More Please

When ever Cooper is having fun playing a game with you and you stop he always says, "More Please".  He has a way of making you laugh and enjoy playing the game with him.   When you are really enjoying something you hate for it to stop.  I think of the many times I am enjoying living with Cooper and his parents.  More Please!

Hey I'm still the parent

Several weeks ago I unexpectedly spent 6 days in the hospital for congestive heart failure.  I won't go into all the details but basically my heart went into an abnormal beat, my heart had a clot, and I have a serious leaky valve.   This was my family's and friends'  first encounter with the fact that I am 74 and am subject to illness. It would be so easy to be taken care of yet as appreciative as I am of all the love and concern I still want to be the parent and the adult that I have always been.  I'm not ready to give up yet.

Friends and Angels

Recently I have gotten several emails about Angels are like our friends.   Don't usually read all these emails but lately being sick has made me realize how much I appreciate my friends.    Maybe they are angels.   They seem to be there when you need them even though far away.   They have known you so long that you don't have to explain yourself.  They love you.  I am so blessed to have these wonderful friends/angels in my life.  YOU know who you are.  Thank you.

Angels keep surrounding us.  It's fun to watch my families' friends and how connected they are to each other.  I can see that same love growing in there younger lives.   They meet for play dates with their children, socialize, help each other when they are down or just stay connected because they too know each other and have already been through a lot together.  It is so comforting to know that they have friends who love them and will be around for a long time to come.

Good to be home again

It is so good to be back in your own bed and especially good to hear Cooper yell Gee, Gee, looking for me.   He is like the happy little elephant in the GE Imagine ad on TV.   He comes bouncing into my room as happy as can be and you can't help but have a smile and think what a great day this is.   Being in the hospital is always an experience.   Having volunteered at Texas Children's in Houston for 9 years gave me a great experience of staff and doctors.   So am not afraid of the hospital but there is nothing like home where you feel you have more control over your day and your life.

Shock and Awe

I thought I had bronchitis that didn't seem to want to get better and low and behold it turned out to congestive heart failure.   I won't go into all the details but it is not exciting to hear the words clot and leaky valve.  Am on blood thinner medicine waiting for the next steps.   So first came the shock.  I had no idea and was not even thinking that my heart wasn't working right.   I go in for regular check ups so we are not sure when the heart started its decline.  Here it was Valentine's Day and the test didn't work.  It would mean waiting for a clot to dissolve and you hear these words over and over.  Don't fall down, if you have any bleeding be careful, special diet, get your blood checked every week, etc. etc.  I started thinking hmmmm if I don't wake up in the morning I have lived a wonderful life.  To be faced with all the uncertainty causes a lot of thinking about family and what if this is the big one.

Then came the awe.   My son and daughter-in-law were outstanding in their care and concern for me.  The ICU personnel were excellent and made my week there comfortable.  I started lining up all the blog ideas that I didn't want to miss writing.   Friends and family came to visit.   Good conversations.  Lots of thinking about my life overall and how much I've learned about spirituality and giving to others.

This experience makes you realize how vunerable you are but also how much love and support there is to help you face the next steps. Time will tell.

The things you would never have known about

Being around young people and a grand baby introduces you to many things you never would have experienced otherwise.   I am now a regular Nik Jr. TV fan and can tell you all about the Wonder Pets,  Dino Dan, and Max and Ruby.   By the way where are Max and Ruby's parents?

It's amazing how much is out there and how many children know it all.   At Christmas a little boy that was visiting saw an elf on Cooper's shelf and said to me "please don't move him, he might lose his powers".  That's when I found out all about the Elf on the Shelf Christmas story.  Apparently every child knows about this story.   Some times I think we think our world is all there is and then you step into a child's world and see another whole side of life.  The same thing is true when you are around 30-36 year olds.   What they watch on TV,  think about the world, their ambitions are all fresh and new and you realize how much you have forgotten about your early dreams and interests.   It is great to be awakened and remember just by watching and listening.

A comforting sound

One of the joys of living everyday with your grandchild is experiencing all the changes from day to day.   Every morning it is such a comforting sound to hear him wake up.   Sometime you hear him singing.  Sometime he sits up in his bed and yells Hey, Hey.   For some reason he doesn't get up or open the door which he could do but waits to see who is going to come and get him out of bed.     Sometimes he reads a book.   Whatever the method you know that a new day is dawning and it is going to be fun and filled with laughter.   It is a comforting sound and you are glad you are alive to experience it.

It wasn't easy

I had lived in a small two bedroom condo for over 13 years.   As I looked around at all the things I had acquired in those years, I felt overwhelmed. Previously Matt and I had lived for 20 years in 3 bedroom house and when he graduated from college and went out on his own I had moved to the condo.   I thought I had downsized then but boy was I wrong.   Just where to begin.   We decided that our goal would be to be in Austin by April of 2010.   Here it was about October 2009 and I had a lot to do to get rid of many of my acquisitions, prep and sell the condo and move my life to Austin. I organized myself to do something everyday and work on a plan to get it all done.   I learned a lot about myself going through this process.  First I went through all my belongings, clothes, books, dishes, jewelry, etc.   This took about 3 or 4 weeks.   I put them into catagories of what I would give away, sell, and keep.  I learned that I could get rid of lots of things.  More to share next time.

An offer I couldn't refuse

It was a wonderful phone call.  All the family lived in Austin and I lived in Houston.   The call was my son and daughter-in-law inviting me to come live with them so that I wouldn't miss out on all the day to day events.  I had not even imagined or wished for such a great offer so it made it a real surprise, an honor, and something that I really wanted to take seriously and think it through.   Little Cooper was about a year old and they wanted to be sure he knew all the members of his family.  I had already been to Austin many times and met all Ashley's family who already made me feel welcomed and at home.   The real questions were was I ready to leave year's of friends, being a volunteer child advocate, and a volunteer lay chaplain at Texas Children's Hospital.  Was I ready to make another transition, go to a new city and start life there.   I gave it a great deal of thought and decided it was the right thing to do.  I wasn't going because I was sick or had no other alternatives.   It was a decision based on looking at all the options and criteria for the move.   Now at 74 I was off to another new adventure.